I think my vagina is haunted
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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