don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
