yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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