Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
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