And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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