It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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