No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
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