The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
