Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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