I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
