i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize