i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
