my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
