What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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