TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
