3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Shame is for Republicans.
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