i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
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