I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
