Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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