Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
