how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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