haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Randomize
