on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
