I'm really into asian looking animals
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize