dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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