dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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