see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Boobs speak an international language.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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