best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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