Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I AM VODKA MAN
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
