the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize