forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
