Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
The power of my boobs compel you
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
