I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
