what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
