Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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