I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
