I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
