i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
A+ Viking dick
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
