He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
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