Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
