so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
