Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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