can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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