vagina is talking i cant
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Randomize
