if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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