I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
