How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
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