It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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