There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
