im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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