I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
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