your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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